Nervous about Surgeon

[Windows]

I have an upcoming operation. I had a scan and then went to see the surgeon. The surgeon didn’t show me the scan, talk about the scan, or say anything about the operation that was specific to me and my case. Does that seem normal? It was just paperwork - sign the consent form - and responding to my questions in a generic (and non-empathetic) way. I’m feeling very nervous about it now and annoyed at myself for not making him say something about my scan. I was just surprised. Anyone had that before?

 

[Accipiter]

Sorry to hear of your worries and concerns regarding your appointed surgeon. Id definitely be getting back in touch with him/the hospital - especially the hospital - and making them aware of your concerns.

I've had three operations to my wrist/hands area: a TFCC (Tri-fibro Cartlidge Complex) repair - left wrist, and Trapeziectomy to both thumbs (hence saying wrist/hands area). All done by the same surgeon who explained clearly what was involved and what he'd be doing. Because of this I had no concerns... worries? yes for possible effects of the anesthesia and such... but none for the operations.

You haven't said what the operation is for, fully respected, but whatever ANY operation is for the surgeon and hospital staff shou5be making EVERY effort to have you reassured it's the right way for you. Voice your concerns... He/She may well be the very best for the procedure your being lined up for BUT that's no excuse for not giving you every option to be reassured.

 

[duke]

I would feel nervous also. My gastro surgeon went through everything with me prior to the knife. Explaining how he was going to do it etc. Paper work was dealt with by the staff. He even visited me in hospital on discharge day right after a round of golf. Very pleasant as if you had known him for years. Also same great service from my wife's surgeon.

 

[duke]

Your surgeon sounds like my GP, zero emotion clock watcher but she is efficient and does not hesitate to make referrals for a specialist.
I'm sure the surgery will go fine. Any chance to get another appointment with him prior to the day?

 

[PAC1]

I had an operation on Wednesday. The surgeon was the complete opposite. Talked about specifics for me and when he got the scan he wrote to me telling me the implications (good thankfully). I would see if you can have another appointment to discuss specifically you.

 

[Windows]

Thanks for all the responses. I’ve talked it over with my wife and processed it a bit more and I’ve realised that it’s not just that the doctor didn’t refer to my specific scan and medical situation and didn’t engage with my questions in a helpful way, but that I’m deeply uncomfortable because I’ve been pushed down a path towards surgery where the risks don’t match the benefits to me personally. Now that I have that clarity, I can do the work to unwind things - probably involving another doctor instead. This morning I was really confused about the whole thing and your responses helped dispel that so thanks. I’ve got a way forward now.

The surgery is not considered major - should be pretty routine - but they wanted to do it in a way where brain fluid leaks and blindness are risks. Doesn’t make sense given my situation.

 

[Accipiter]

Glad to hear the responses given have helped you towards a decision... Wishing you all the best with this.

 

[Lons]

Good luck with whatever you decide, it has to be right for you not what might be easiest or cheapest for the hospital.

It's very unusual these days to find a doctor or consultant who doesn't engage and explain properly unlike the old days when they were treated like Gods and some thought they were.

I have a medical family btw including one who was a specialist heart surgeon so I've come across quite a few socially.

 

[Woodbloke]

Thanks for all the responses. I’ve talked it over with my wife and processed it a bit more and I’ve realised that it’s not just that the doctor didn’t refer to my specific scan and medical situation and didn’t engage with my questions in a helpful way, but that I’m deeply uncomfortable because I’ve been pushed down a path towards surgery where the risks don’t match the benefits to me personally. Now that I have that clarity, I can do the work to unwind things - probably involving another doctor instead. This morning I was really confused about the whole thing and your responses helped dispel that so thanks. I’ve got a way forward now.

The surgery is not considered major - should be pretty routine - but they wanted to do it in a way where brain fluid leaks and blindness are risks. Doesn’t make sense given my situation.

As far as I can see, you're the patient and it's your body; you're entitled to every single bit of relevant information that the surgeon has. For him not to divulge the information seems totally unprofessional and very strange. When I had my prostate op ten years ago, the team I was dealing with bent over backwards to explain everything, so I was happy in the choice (one of three) that I eventually made - Rob

 

[RogerS]

I agree with everything that has been said and to be honest if it were me I'd insist on meeting the surgeon again and if still unhappy then request someone else.

Who is saying that you need the op. ? The whole thing smacks of poor healthcare. Carlisle ? I know that some have had OK results but they do have form.

Sorry to hear of your worries and concerns regarding your appointed surgeon. Id definitely be getting back in touch with him/the hospital - especially the hospital - and making them aware of your concerns.

I've had three operations to my wrist/hands area: a TFCC (Tri-fibro Cartlidge Complex) repair - left wrist, and Trapeziectomy to both thumbs (hence saying wrist/hands area). All done by the same surgeon who explained clearly what was involved and what he'd be doing. Because of this I had no concerns... worries? yes for possible effects of the anesthesia and such... but none for the operations.

You haven't said what the operation is for, fully respected, but whatever ANY operation is for the surgeon and hospital staff shou5be making EVERY effort to have you reassured it's the right way for you. Voice your concerns... He/She may well be the very best for the procedure your being lined up for BUT that's no excuse for not giving you every option to be reassured.

Frank, I'd be interested to hear more about your hand/wrist ops as I suspect that I will need to be going down that root sometime in the future.

 

[Accipiter]

Sorry to hear that Roger... TFCC or the Trepeziectomy? Any questions just fire away and I'll do my best to answer them.

 

[Windows]

Yes, it’s Carlisle ENT, Roger.

 

[Windows]

Been a bit busy, but I did change doctor. I had a meeting with the new one and she was totally normal and easy to talk to. I did see the scan. She listened to what I had to say, we agreed on a conservative approach to the surgery, and I should have it done sometime in the next month or so. Feeling pretty calm about it now.

 

[shafiq]

Been a bit busy, but I did change doctor. I had a meeting with the new one and she was totally normal and easy to talk to. I did see the scan. She listened to what I had to say, we agreed on a conservative approach to the surgery, and I should have it done sometime in the next month or so. Feeling pretty calm about it now.

Good outcome that, well done on persevering and standing your ground. They don't do it on purpose some surgeons/doctors. I always think of it as they have been through rigorous training for so many years that the social skills side of things is sometimes a bit lacking.

Thankfully lately new (outside teams, non med related) are also involved in their training and there's been a massive emphasis on people skills in the last 10 years. Things are catching up well.

I had similar - cross paths with them all the time so know and anti-social skills one from a good-social skills - when speaking to my be belly button hernia guy. But thankfully he did explain things reasonably well and am confident it will go well..

All the best with your surgery and recovery process.

 

[RogerS]

Out of curiosity I wondered what the response of ChatGPT would be and paraphrased your original post substituting 'my sister'for 'I' etc. This was the well-reasoned reply.

 

[Lons]

Been a bit busy, but I did change doctor. I had a meeting with the new one and she was totally normal and easy to talk to. I did see the scan. She listened to what I had to say, we agreed on a conservative approach to the surgery, and I should have it done sometime in the next month or so. Feeling pretty calm about it now.

Good news and exactly what should have happened the first time around.

My wife had a bad experience 10 years ago with a consultant who said he didn't believe the pain came from her hip. Based his decision on one old X-ray and messed her around for months, he definitely didn't like to be questioned. She changed consultant who was completely different and had both hips done very quickly. The delays and errors of the first consultant caused lesions in the bone which needed grafts and had it been a few months longer the operation on at least one hip might well have been less successful.

Although her situation was uncommon you really have to question everything.

 

[Windows]

I’m sorry that happened to your wife. I hope she’s doing well and wasn’t too traumatised.

I had a bad medical experience decades ago - a collapsed lung that the GP refused to recognise because it wasn’t causing me pain despite the fact hospital had already x-rayed & confirmed and it was my second time - kept saying my symptoms were down to something else and sending me for blood tests instead of sending for another x-ray or to a specialist - crazy really. I could have just woken up dead at any time with a tension pneumothorax. I appreciate that most doctors are hard working, intelligent, professionals, but also they’re human and the joke about “what do you call the person who comes bottom of the class at medical school” is frequently on my mind following that experience.